First, Coffee

2/4/22 Saturday

No hydrotherapy for care client (or me) today- which is a shame because my glutes could benefit from heat treatment. Instead, we took a spin in her new car - and discovered it has heated seats! Happy glutes, although the warmth floods in like unexpected menstruation so it’s not entirely pleasant at first. Outside the temperature has dipped, we are indoors now with the heater on, playing a YouTube scene of a lakeside, with cherry blossom and vibrant birdsong. Care client is plucking her guitar. I am psyching myself up to get back into novel writing. Just a sentence or so, I say, that’s all you need do, to break the habit of not doing it. I will make a hot drink, I will remember how good it feels to get this work done.

3/4/22 Sunday

This morning the curtains drew back to a blank sheet of mist. I ventured to the vernal lushness of the polytunnel to cut myself a bowl of leafy veg. My fingers were iced on the return journey, though the garden is getting warm with floral colour.

On my commute, sun seared through the mist- behind glass it was warm.

At work, took care client for a little stroll through Par Garden Centre; sheltered from the wind the sun was noticeable; a man in shorts informed us he could hear a chiff-chaff singing so summer was on its way. Swallows next, he said, looking up. No swallows appeared but the sky was cheerful, it was worth a look.

Work chores done and my dinner cooking (roasted onion with lentils and tomatoes, I’ve already eaten the leafy stuff) I am sitting down to write. Care client is playing electronic saxophone with amazing static feedback. Her eyes are narrowed in creative concentration, her mouth curved happy. We are an artistic collective. Be jealous.

4/4/22 Monday

Birdsong snuck into restless dreams around 7am. I am overtired, this is going to be a busy week, not the best of combinations. Am motivated by bringing dreams to life which is a strong balancing factor, but I should check my diary and find some time to rest. 

5/4/22 Tuesday

Coffee, agroforestry lesson, get dressed, load van, go land! Can’t find a hand trowel so use a hand fork to plant primroses, thyme, sedums, phlox, lemon balm, honeysuckle, dianthus, a bit of columbine (aquilegia) root. Mr mulched the base of each cheap fruit tree- if we treat them well they may forget they are cheap. My hair is loose because I washed it, it blows around my face and competes with the spring blooms for colour- pink daisies may have me beat.

Loaded van again, went to Middle Daughter’s for a family lunch. Grandchild 6 with a hot cross bun, every single time she finds a raisin or sultana-

‘OH MY GOD!’

eyes wide, mouth an O, as though each one was exquisitely rare. She has the option of eating raisins from a bowl but that loses the sense of discovery: she mines the bun, she is amazed. Grandchild 7 sits in a puddle, so after we’ve finished playing in the garden (I got stuck in a bramble thicket, no one is at all surprised) he abandons all lower garments and drives his electric tractor from kitchen to front room and back again, feeling free.

6/4/22 Wednesday

This morning grey is not an anonymous shade but billows of light, soft as a fur belly, comfort in a rough world.

Care client has a riding session booked, which she loves, then we come home to set up her new inflatable under-the-sea disco tent! I love it. Care client is enjoying looking at it but won’t yet be tempted inside. She is sat in a sunny spot, in velour leisurewear, far too relaxed to play. Every once in a while she plucks a harp, then takes another nap.

7/4/22 Thursday

Mr makes the journey from Lawhitton to Daventry, he has booked himself and the van into a campsite (he has gone to support students at a Black Belt grading). I make the journey to St. Austell, where my care client is still tired and happy like yesterday and when dark comes we will set up the disco tent, to best appreciate its lighting tricks.

Disco tent update: lighting tricks are FUN- colours on the under-sea pictures also change. Care client sits, entranced by the light; her long sweep of eyelashes gives her a strong moth vibe. (I covered the noise of the pump with loud disco tunes which led to me dancing with such abandon I very nearly achieved full splits. Disco stretches are now a thing.)

I get home to discover I have won a brace of tickets for a distillery tour!

8/4/22 Friday

Mr messages to say his night in the van was cold. I have an extra blanket here too, and was pleased to find the fire had not gone out. I’m buzzing because other than teaching this evening, the day is free of obligations. I have plenty of things that could be done like plant trees, write a novel, cook food, tidy the house- but am attempting a balance between my love of getting stuff done and the basic human truth that resting is important to the journey too, and the journey is your life, not to be rushed. First, coffee.

Hear the birds call. Look at the sky- it’s a flat pale silver and the tall pine stands thinly pretty, contrasted, emerald-black. I can see white blossoms on the warm brown branches of a plum and a pear. Wonky slates on the stone shed roof, wet, rain brings the blue-grey patina to life; lime coloured lichen growing island shapes. My small world. My beautiful life.